Tuesday, 28 February 2012

QH3 Run 752. Old Colonial, Compton Acres, Nottingham. 27/02/2012

Old Colonial Pub, Compton Acres, Nottingham

More often than not, when Butcher's Dog is the hare, she gets a good soaking whilst laying the trail. Tonight was no exception. The gathering of the pack was preceded by rain, putting off some fair weather hashers, but by the time we got away it was a pleasant and mild evening for February. Even Too Tuf and Chicki made the start.
We were promised a short trail with many checks and that's what we got - often passing over several close checks whilst still in calling distance with the back of the pack. This added interest to the trail, especially when two halves of the hash pack met each other coming from different directions. This bit of double looping gave Silent Pants and Clementine a chance to catch the pack after their slow start. 
Eager Beaver, Bugger and Rasher set the pace, the latter still with fresh legs after a sub-two hour 15 mile Belvoir challange two days before. There was quite a lot about competitiveness and beavers during this hash. The Quorn Hash was honoured by the presence of Mickleover Hashers Dobber and Lionel, definitely non-competitive these two but apparently good at making a Beaver sandwich.
I must have been going really slow as Butt Plug was streamlining me into the ON-INN and Too Tuf was already there in the car park.
The pub was relatively quiet, Shrewsbury vs Crawley on Sky Sports not attracting much of a crowd, so the circle was led indoors by the real RA, Silent Pants - this doesn't often happen. How are we going to replace her? The hare had disappeared by the time we came to the circle so Dobber took the DD as a look-alike (!) and bore the brunt of any hare abuse, of which there was little. Most of the DDs were awarded for competitiveness (except Dobber and Lionel) and, for some reason that now escapes me, these were interspersed by Eager Beaver doing the beaver dance. A new grandson for Durex, born on a hash day, also merited a DD. That's the future of hashing looked after.
This was Clementine's and Silent Pants' last run as resident Quorn Hashers. Lincoln aint too far so we could make the occasional hash out that way. Both have been great supporters of the hash and we wish them well. At least I wont have to struggle to keep up with a bus pass holder anymore!
This was Run 752.

Tuesday, 21 February 2012

Quorn Hash House Awards for 2011

This is the list of the Quorn Hash Awards for 2011.

Hasher of the year 2011 – Durex
Most Hares 2011 – Butt Plug
Most Runs 2011 – Durex
Best Trail 2011 – Bugger (Bagworth Heath Car park)
Worst Trail 2011 – Smutley (Belvoir Brewery, Old Dalby)
Best On Inn 2011 – Sherpa (Her Place)
Worst On Inn 2011 – Too Tuf (White Lion, Rempstone)
Best Circle 2011 – Transit (Buxton)
Best Supporting Act 2011 – IP (accompanying Sweet Pea)
Largest Pack 2011 – Underlay (Knockerdown, Carsington)
Smallest Pack 2011 – Smutley (Railway & Nelson, Kimberley)
Catering Award 2011 – Malti (Dinner at Buxton)
Biggest Loser 2011 – Sweet Pea (appendicectomy)
Henry V Award 2011 – Rasher (stepping in to lay trails)
Best Newcomer 2011 – Missed Erection
Most Travelled 2011 – Diarrhoea
Defector 2011 – Butcher’s Dog (now goes biking with Chris)
The Late Award 2011 – Clementine (1/2 hour late for red dress run)
Pain in the Arse for the GM Award 2011 – Smutley
Dumper 2011 – Shagulater (Shipley Country Park)
Jekyll & Hyde 2011 – Gate Crusher (the trail from Manvers Arms, Radcliff on Trent)
Best Pub 2011 – Barritone (Old Oak, Horsley Woodhouse)
Best Use of Flour – not on trail 2011 - Goblin (shortbread feet)
Falling of a log – 2011 – Skids (falling off a crocodile in Ruddington Park)
Hash Widow 2011 – Enema
Bravery Award 2011 – Miss Take me Now (flying with Shagulater)
Bootlegger 2011 – Wallington
Gourmet 2011 – Silent Pants (Ordering Pizza when at Sherpa’s house)
Blonde moment 2011 - Chicki

QH3 Run 751 The Bull's Head, Nailstone, Leics. 19/02/2012

Today's hash was so far south the pub had a Coventry postcode, but still under 50 minutes drive and nice to have a stroll in the Leicestershire countryside on what was a lovely sunny, albeit little chilly, day. Hare for the day was Wallington, shame there weren't more hashers around to enjoy this hash. The pack was just five - myself, Malteaser, Skids, Goblin and Bugger - not a sole from Nottinghamshire had crossed south over the border!
With such a small pack checking was hard work. Indeed it was Malteaser who blazed the trail for the first 10 minutes. By the time Bugger got to the front he was able to experience his favourite bit of hashing, a water crossing. Having returned from a slippery downhill check myself I was surprised to find Bugger still standing in the middle of the stream (outside temp 3ÂșC). No doubt he was watching to see who ignored the bars on the bridge. A unanimous vote by all hashers present decided it would be easier if everyone ignored the bars and Bugger got a DOWN-DOWN for sticking to hash rules.
Bess enjoying a paddle
Three quarters of the way around we met the hare going the other way. Wallington was fulfilling his haring duties having sent Skids and Bess on a shorter trail he came back to make sure we were all finding the way around. No problem today with the A-Team on checking duty.
I may have missed the photo opportunity of Bugger standing up to his knees, but I was mildly amused to come around a bend and find Bess striking the exact same pose in the middle of a deep muddy puddle. Bugger teach the bitch to do some checking!
In the Bull's Head we all fitted around a single table. We were determined to spend all the hash subs for the day, even if it meant Skids getting her mouth around some salty nuts. Malteaser got a the first DD for her trail-blazing start; Skids got a DD for looking after the hash hound; Bugger, who led the circle, was interpreted and congratulated for his adherence to hash markings - the only one stupid enough (apart from Bess) to wade through water when it was so cold. Yours truly got a hashy birthday DD. The hare, of course, got suitably rewarded for a good run. This was the way I saw and did Run 751.

Thursday, 16 February 2012

MH3 Run 224. Midway Inn, Midway. 13/02/2012

Off to unknown hashing territory for this hash set by Bugger. Although I live in South Derbyshire this was like going somewhere foreign and I had to reach for the map to find where Midway was. Half-way between Burton and Ashby de la Zouch explained Bugger. A lot of thought obviously went into the naming of this place. Just imagine we could be living in a village called Not-quite-Derby and we could all be hashing with the Not-quite-Derby Hash House Harriers.

Weather was better than it has been, temperatures above freezing but hazard warnings about ice-covered paths and water-logged football pitches issued by the hare before the start. A well-formed pack of 8 plus the hare set off into the hashing unknown, well equipped with torches. Less than 1 mile into the hash, checking down an unlit country path, and my left foot had already sank into deep cold icy water. Paths through a parkland area zig-zagging down a slope, the hare using teasing checks that if it was daylight could have easily been sorted with a few shortcuts.
The path up past the Ski Slope (yes Midway has a ski centre!) perversely had the snowiest/shiggiest part of the run. It was noted that neither Dobber or Lionel were to be seen on this part of the hash. The pack was keeping well together with Gobalot, Oriface, Malteaser and Goblin actively helping the more established FRBs (yours truly and Pigeon Hole). I thought Midway had a lot of shops for a small town, Malteaser informed me this was Swadlincote, our administrative centre for South Derbyshire.

I thought I'd  sussed the Hare's strategy after correctly choosing the right way at five consecutive checks. Getting the next five wrong brought me down to earth and back to the rear of the pack. How did the hare find that footpath through a narrow hole in the hedge and what about those back passages and alley ways that even Butt Plug would struggle find? After nearly one-and-half hours, I spied the pub - rule 15(b) applies, ignore the trail and head for the pub. I wondered why I was the first back, Oriface and Gobalot religously followed the flour in a quarter mile loop around the pub. Malteaser was heard to say she thought about heading for the pub but couldn't do so because the hare was with her.

Dobber led the circle and there were DDs for all, in particular for Bugger for a well laid trail. This was the way I ran it - the Durex version of MH3 Run 224.

Monday, 6 February 2012

QH3 Award Night and Run 750, Test Match, West Bridgford

Hosts for the evening - Too Tuf and Chicki

 Saturday 4th February was the annual QH3 awards held at the Test Match, West Bridgford. The adventure started before that. Heavy snow falling since mid afternoon meant some never made it to the venue. We picked up Skids from Kegworth, roads still drivable into Nottingham. Plan A was to leave the car at the Test Match, taxi back to Kegworth and then pick it up after the next day’s hash. Plan A started well. First to arrive, we helped to rearrange furniture in the Monroe Suite for the 20 award night guests before we all tucked into our pre-ordered menu.
Enthralled guests?
Too Tuf and Chicki led the awards ceremony (results not publicly available yet!),  ending at 11:20.  By now the snow was deeper, public transport had ceased to run, and our pre-ordered taxi decided it couldn’t make it. Wallington and Plan B to the rescue. No problem for Wallington, ex-racing driver, to get us back to Kegworth in his Kia.  Roads were fine, Britain goes into panic with 10 cm snow, no reason for a pre-booked taxi to let us down.

On Sunday it was from the Test Match that the second innings of the Quorn hashy weekend commenced. Run 750 set by Chicki celebrating 25 years of hashing. Except it hadn’t been set due to the heavy snow. This was going to be a live hare laid with flour with lumpy bits. Was Chicki and her little helper going to be able to get going before 11:00? In my 27 years of hashing, snowy runs like this can be counted on one hand, though with much of my hashing done in the tropics I suppose that’s not much surprise. Skids brought along the sledge, a first Quorn Hash done by sledge? Cars left overnight were cleared of snow during a big snowball fight. A few no balls there.

QH3 Hash pack for run 750 (minus Barritone in shorts and T-shirt parking his bike!) Photo by Durex
It was a reasonably sized pack considering the conditions, about ten, though that may include the snowman.  Barritone was in regulation hash gear – T-shirt and shorts having arrived by bicycle. Everyone else looked as though they were going mountaineering. In the absence of any hash committee, the run was started by the most decorated hasher of the awards night, Smutley. No half measures from the hare, a regular length run of 5.4 miles which took an hour-and-a-half on account of the numerous stops for snow ball fights and sledging. Snow made the running hard but it wasn’t icy, and a bright sunny start had warmed things up to just above freezing. I tried to get into the hares head to work out the flour laying strategy, unfortunately I found nothing there. Neat checking circles were laid by a stationary size nine hasher, false trails were laid by a larger size shoe.

The three Beverley sisters – glamorous grannies Miss Takemenow, Skids and Malteaser – ably abetted by Shagulater, turned a few heads sledging. Usually you have to have a child in tow in order to play in the snow like this. Butt Plug was active in sorting out some of the more tricky checks but it was Barritone and those FRBs IP and Sweet Pea who joined me chasing the hare to the ON INN.
A sledging hash - photos by Shagulater
Skids and Malteaser

Miss Takemenow

A memorable hash was made even better with hash chip butties. Chicki making an early attempt for Hash of the Year. Multiple award win Smutley led the circle ending by justifiably thanking the hare for a wonderful awards night and memorable hash in the snow.

Just to prove we did a proper hash trails, this is it, as run by Durex - Run 750.

AH4 Run 29, White Lion, Great Longstone. 04/02/2012

The Peak District is wonderful hashing country, none more so than the area to the north of Bakewell. Today we returned to the White Lion in Great Longstone, a long journey for some, especially with the thermometer down at -5°C. Some wimps and wussies never made it. However, seven hardy hashers turned up for Crooked Squire's maiden trail, tutored by Wheelchair and Flying Bottom. Make that six, Totem Pole was only heard but not seen on the trail. Kama Sutra was a newcomer to AH4, a bit different to hashing in Mexico! Some Swiss hash markings crept into the trail, “F” being used to mark the end of false trails. Malteaser interpreted the first “F” she came across as an arrow and headed off northwards on the Monsal Trail undisturbed, and obviously unaware, that nobody was following her for the next half mile. She was my driver home so I had an interest in making sure she didn’t get too lost. It took a while to catch up with Horse’s Arse, RA and FRB.
Horse's Arse and Malteaser Run 29
A cold beer stop up on Longstone Edge
Up and up we went to Longstone Edge, a beer stop after four miles. Beer AND cake stop – gets my vote for a good run. It was cold, and got colder as we ran onto the snow on Longstone Moor (391m).  What goes up has to come down. The ON IN was a long down hill trail, frost-hard ground tough on aging knees and backs. A seven mile hash, with several shortcut options, and this was the way I did it, long of course. AH4 Run 29.

RA got a quick circle done before the White Lion served up some of its lovely food. Right on schedule the snow started to fall, early afternoon. And so ended part 1 of our hashy weekend – ON ON to the QH3 awards night in Nottingham…..