QH3 Run 862. The Old Vicarage, Whetstone, Leicester

RUN #862
Date : Sunday 15th March 2015(11:00)
Location: The Old Vicarage, Whetstone (LE8 6JH)
Hares: Dope and Heroin
Weather: Overcast, dry with chill in the air
Pack size: 12

The hares for the day, Dope and Heroin, introduced their trail with some excuses. Dope would be walking, the only one to do so today, because of injury. Reference was made to crossing railway lines and it was noted that we would not find a Heroin tied to the track - she would be sweeping the pack around the trail. We used many virgin trails from an On Inn not used before and most of the time nobody knew where they were. I did recognise the path along the now disused Great Central Railway track and correctly surmised we where heading in the direction of London. B*gger was able to reel off a load of facts about the aforementioned railway line and why it would make an ideal route for HS2. It made a good route for hashers, including a precipitous false trail down the embankment which I chickened out of doing after only a couple of yards. The fact we were running in the Leicester area did bring back traumatic flashbacks of Captain Oates' infamous trail from the Dry Dock. 

It was a good length trail and one odd bit with flour in several directions where Dope had changed his mind. Obviously American miles are shorter than what we use. The promised trail of 6.1 miles turned out to be more than 7 GB miles. B*gger moaned a lot, including pointing out to the hare that she had a tendency to start walking along the correct trail at checks somewhat giving the game way. The positive of getting B*gger to moan was offset by not losing Captain Oates.

Back at the On Inn a bloody Barritone was totally unaware of his injury. We're a

Bloody Barritone

tuff hash. The RA (Butt Plug) made some excuses about Mother's Day and the need to leave early, taking Too Tuf and Chicki with him. You'ld have thought he'd been quite at home in the Old Vicarage. Instead we had to make do with the Curate (Captain Oates). This meant we couldn't give a DD for Captain Oates passing his HGV test or his use of his new juicer to process Jaffa cakes. Other missed opportunities for DDs were mothers and the Irish (St Patricks Day tomorrow). We don't have many of either on the hash. 

First DD went to B*gger for a good moaning performance today. Next DD was awarded to myself - OAP - for putting my safety first and not descending down that very steep false trail. Wallington tried to get out of christening his new shoes but the threat of having to drink out of Captain Oates' size 15s soon changed his mind. Barritone who did a splendid job standing in for the Curate on Run 860, and needed a beer to anaesthetise his arm wound, got the fourth DD. The hares were thanked for a good run decided by a non-secret ballot.

Wallington christening his new shoes

That's the way I saw it today..On On..Durex.

Trail as done by Durex

MH3 Run 261. Bell and Harp, Little Eaton

MH3 Run 261
Date: Monday 9th March 2015
Location: Bell and Harp, Little Eaton (DE21 5AE)
Hares: K2 and Spike
Weather: Wet day
Pack size: 4 walkers; 6 r*nners; and 2 hares

B*gger reports:

The email that Dobber sends out about the forthcoming Mickleover trail, will during the winter months at least, always include the postscript for us to remember to bring a torch – never, has a torch been more needed, to say it was dark, does not give sections of this trail justice – if I had come across Lord Lucan, Flight MH370 and Shergar in those woods I would not have been in the least bit surprised…

A motley crew of mainly MH3 hashers gathered in the car park of the Bell & Harp, luckily they waited for me to get ready before setting off – the fact that I was a ‘runner’ & had a torch put me in rare company. 

We set off down the road to the first check, not near any obvious alternative routes – this was the first of many.  After one blob and 300 yards up a bridle path, the next check was found weirdly on a bridge over a stream – apparently this is very picturesque spot, but in the pitch dark it was a lost on the pack.  After about 500 yards Trianal located the 3^rd blob and we battled against the mud up the hill to the next check – in an attempt to keep the pack together the hares had cunningly marked some checks with a ‘T’ – this was to signify that the FRBs should wait until 10 hashers were there before continuing, difficult tonight as there was only a (running) pack of 8 including the hares.  Most of us held the check until everyone had caught up, except for Trianal who chose not to wait and continued on his own – he wasn’t seen again until the pub.  We then entered the woods, if you didn’t have a torch (like Artless Dodger) you were extremely likely to get stuck in deep mud, fall off a cliff, run into a fence or just disappear – it was a case of sticking together, the hares doing an excellent job of waiting for the checkers to catch up again after each check.   After apparently passing an Iron Age fort (where the trail followed a very precarious path), we lost the flour, the hare didn’t know where we should be either but urged us to continue anyway!

After a total of 3 miles, the pack had completed the first of two promised loops and so with the offer of beer 5 minutes away, most of the pack headed back shortcutting what I thought was the best part of the trail. No one else had this opinion because this part of the trail was only completed by K2 the hare and me – my reasoning being, that if the hares had laid a trail then I felt duty bound to run it.  Slightly alarmingly we headed off in completely the opposite direction to that of the rest of the pack along the Portway, before turning uphill at the check.  From the top the trail cut across numerous fields – I’m sure on a clear day or just in daylight it would be cracking view, but tonight we struggled to stay on the flour, in fact we missed the final stile by about 200 yards but regained the flour again for the descent down the pub , we decided to miss the loop to see Betty’s box on the grounds that we been out quite a while.

Dobber conducted the circle in the pub – DDs were awarded to Gobalot for remaining remarkably quiet during the evening – she even said she was speechless, Lionel for moaning but not enough to take over my role – he was therefore nominated as being B*gger’s deputy, Woggle got a DD for taking time off from electioneering and Trianal for going AWOL, finally the hares, were awarded for a good run although they were asked to repeat the trail in the summer when it would be light!

Trail as done by B*gger

AH4 Run 58. The Shire Horse, Wyaston

RUN #58

Date : Saturday 7th March 2015
Location: The Shire Horse, Wyaston (DE6 2DQ) 
Hares: Durex and Malteaser
Weather: Spring-like
Pack size: 7


The sky was blue, the wind a bit chilly when exposed, but it certainly felt like spring. A very select pack of just seven set out at eleven, though, as will be revealed later, the pack of hounds

Small select pack that started the trail

increased substantially as we went around. In the absence of the usual FRBs some hashers found themselves having to do a lot of checking. Crooked Squire, having cycled 16 miles to get here, certainly did his fair share of checking the false trails. When we got to the the short-long split, the hare (me) deemed that nobody qualified to do the shorter trail. This was a real shame as I'd run an extra 2 miles to mark this earlier in the day.

The hash paused outside the Watermill, Osmaston

Just past the halfway mark we arrived in the outskirts of Osmaston where a scenic check was marked outside the watermill. Our arrival in Osmaston coincided with the start of the hunt. We had the bizarre sight of the hounds and horses being chased by the hare and hounds. Not sure what the four-legged hounds were chasing but they followed our trail for some way out of Osmaston. Twice we caught them up whilst their hounds sought out the scent. It certainly increased the number of hounds running this trail to an unprecedented large number. As we returned to the village of Wyaston the normally quite country roads were busy with a another pack seeking out the hunt, those in cars trying to keep up with the hunt.

Moist seeking out the scent of the trail whilst the rest of the 'hunt' waits at a check!

I felt a bit of a social outcast as I didn't meet anyone on this run (hashers excepted) that I knew. Crooked Squire stopped to chat to some fellow 'athletes' of his acquaintance, Wriggle knew several of those following the hunt, as did Moist who looked as though she was doing a bit of curb crawling when we arrived at the On Inn.
The circle was short and quick so we could get on with eating. Crooked Squire got a DD as sustenance for his cycle journey home and Moist for the aforementioned curb crawling. The trail was declared a good run with a special mention of the excellent weather and the added bonus of running with the hunt.
A lovely morning spent hashing...On On ...Durex

Trail as set by Durex (long and short)
Total of 15 miles with the setting and sweeping the trail!

QH3 Run 861, Queens Head, Markfield

RUN #861
Date : Sunday 1st March (11:00)
Location: Queens Head, Markfield (LE67 9UB)
Hare: Wallington
Weather: Bright, dry but bitingly cold wind
Pack size: 13

This was a St David's Day Hash, not a daffodil or dragon in sight, and the first day of spring in the meteorological calendar. It didn't feel like spring stepping out of the car at the Queens Head with a strong cold wind. But we were not celebrating these events, no, today was the hare's birthday and we were all given sweeties at the start of the trail. We eventually got started after Skids did a bit of 'cottaging' with Wallington, or was it a trip to see his pussy.
Captain Oates made sure he wasn't going to stand around in his T-shirt in the cold, again arriving about 10 seconds after the departure of the pack. Following a 'C' stop to view the outside of Wallington's cottage, the trail headed off along tracks we haven't used in a long time, and for sure some virgin trails.

FRBs above Hill Hole Quarry waiting for the rest of the pack

Several view points were marked, most notably above Markfield Hill Hole Quarry. From here we could view Malteaser and Skids short-cutting, taking the easier low altitude route through the disused quarry.

Malteaser spotted off-trail taking the easy route

The hare made sure it wasn't only Butcher's Dog had a sausage - we were all treated to hot dogs. This was Wallington's 63rd hare for QH3, one for every year of his life and two to spare! With sweets and food he was making sure this trail was a front-runner for trail of the year.
Our RA kept his record of keeping us dry on a day of sunshine and heavy showers. Butt Plug awarded the first DD to Chicki for doubting his ability having seen raindrops on the car windscreen on the journey to Markfield. Capt Oates, who didn't have to rush off to work for once, had a lot of awards to catch upon. Today we just settled for more abuse about his car and his inability to open the door. There was little need for run discussion as the hare's provision of hot dogs was well appreciated, indeed this had all the ingredients of a very good hash trail. The hare received his DD to the tune of 'Hashy Birthday'. That left one DD which Malteaser qualified for on two accounts. Firstly, she was seen short-cutting along the easy route in Hill Hole Quarry and then she was observed on the trail answering her iPhone when it was actually Chicki's that was ringing.
Much of the remaining pack retired to Wallington's cottage for tea and cake, another masterpiece from Goblin.

Birthday cake wot we enjoyed goblin'

Goblin wot made the cake

Happy Birthday Wallington, an excellent Hash today...On On ...Durex

Trail as done by Durex